We must feel it to heal it
As a Consulting Hypnotist, Coach, and Reiki practitioner I meet many people with suppressed emotions; many whom do not recognize that the habit, addiction, identity, belief or issue they are experiencing now has ties back to unprocessed emotions from experiences that have not crossed their minds for years.
A staggering number of clients enter hypnotic trance for today’s concern only to discover that it ties back into something they experienced as a small child, memories long locked away in the subconscious mind popping up as over reactions to experiences in the present day. That is what happens when we do not fully process emotion as it arises; our subconscious mind tucks the memory away, tagging it with weighty reactions, ready to pull it up when it senses a new trauma that looks familiar.
Often times parents do not have the skills to recognize that their children are actually handling their emotions perfectly; the sudden squeal of frustration might be the release they need to express their frustration, let off steam, and return to the task with a greater state of calm to try again. Kids use an inherent mechanism telling them to respond to the feeling, let it go, and return back to their natural state. Children are taught to hold back their emotions:
Don’t cry!
Hold your temper!
Children are to be seen and not heard…
Oh, come on, it’s not that bad. It doesn’t hurt that much.
Shake it off!
This is positively terrible advice and rarely works anyhow, except to pile guilt and shame on the emotion the child was already feeling.
We came here to this watery planet as spiritual beings to have a human experience on Earth. Earth is a water planet; water equals emotion making this the best place to come to for all the feels. I do not believe we are meant to stay in the lower energetic feelings like rage, envy, sadness, grief, or shame for a long time; simply have a little taste so you know what it is like, then let it flow through you without grasping on to any of it. Do not choose to own those lower vibes and make them a part of your identity.
Well, that’s nice, Patricia, but I’m only reading this now and I have had many years of stuffing emotions down; now what do I do? You may be asking.
My response would be to start really and truly paying attention to what it is you are feeling, write that down. As each not good feeling thought and recognition arises, write it down too. When you have exhausted the list of all the things you are feeling that do not feel good, make a list of what you would like to be feeling instead. Use your imagination to pretend you feel just one of those good feelings right now, you can do it and you know what I believe you can do it? Likely, if you have time to read this newsletter, that means that nothing is happening for you to be feeling the bad things right now, in this very moment. It is actually your imagination putting the bad feelings in you and pulling up the negative responses. If it is powerful enough to do that without any external stimuli, then it is ALSO powerful enough to bring up a good feeling.
Stop arguing with me in your head and just try it.
Every time you praise something, every time you appreciate something, every time you feel good about something, you are telling the Universe, “More of this, please. More of this, please.” … Abraham
Using your imagination to create good feelings is something you can do on your own to start feeling good right now. If you want to do even more and at a quicker pace, you could seek out someone like me to work with you on removing those blocks to feeling good and reframing the memories in the subconscious mind to exist only as experiences without the emotional charges snapping about in there.
One of the most significant changes that I guide clients to make in hypnosis is forgiveness; you might be surprised to learn that the person we work with the super conscious mind on forgiving, is themself. Forgiveness of others is important, absolutely, and that work is infinitely easier once we allow self-forgiveness. Those thoughts that run through the mind that begin with how could I have been so stupid/foolish/weak/naive and so on, they serve no good purpose. Any time we have those thoughts about the past, we are robbing ourselves of the present; they are a flashing sign indicating a need for self-compassion.
Hypnosis, Body-Talk, talk therapy, and numerous other modalities with a professional we trust can create forward movement in leaps, instead of the baby steps we make on our own. I know because I have taken hundreds of clients there and before that, I did the work myself with professionals I trusted.
By simply questioning the feelings we are having, especially when the power of the feeling goes way beyond what is an appropriate response to the experience, you can start to change how you are in the world, which will change who you are from the inside out.
My greatest wish for you is that you love yourself, not ten minutes, ten pounds, or ten thousand dollars from now, right now; exactly as you are this very minute.
~~~Patricia Meier